Top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

A while ago we told you about when it’s ok to cheat. Today I’m talking to you about when it’s okay to judge. Well, I’m not talking about judging people guilty of murder and rape, but rather about the little things people do that stick out in our eyes. Yes it’s irrational, yes it’s in bad faith, yes it’s subjective, and then what are you going to do?

This top will be illustrated by fictitious judges.

1. People who say “immediately” instead of “immediately”

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Do you have a train to catch to save a quarter of a second to such an extent that it took you to add the “everything” in front? You disgust me.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

Life imprisonment for this bolloss who can’t talk

2. People who talk about their parents by saying “dad” and “mom” when they are over 8 years old

What’s your problem, why don’t you say “my mother”? are you a baby or what? do you have a comforter? You have a comforter. Well okay then.

3. The gross sound people make when they puff their shitty e-cigarettes

Pfft all that while you’re going to die like people who smoke cigarettes in your way, stop showing off because you’re smoking something that smells like grapefruit. Electronic cigarette smokers, you smoke me.

4. People who don’t have the same opinion as me on a film, a book, a play, a podcast, a show

And on just about everything except the taste of the Pom’potes where, strictly speaking, I don’t comment.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

It’s going to jail you pissed me off saying you liked Matrix 4; get out of there

5. Couples who start their sentence with “We with Gaétan blablabla”

But release my word.

6. People who signal to you on the street that your bag is open

Yeah well in fact if I want to leave it open and have my wallet taken I have the right I do what I want we are in a free country as far as I know, right?

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

The law is clear: you better leave people with their bags open

7. People who say “definitely” and “however”

And a big surge of hatred for people who nonchalantly insert a “simply” when they explain something damn them I kill them.

8. People who do the dry January

OK it’s fine to take a booze break from your life but why do it in January? why give it a lame English name? why brag about it to everyone? You want a Nobel Prize because you haven’t harmed yourself for 3 weeks in your life fdp but actually die of your life.

9. People who ask you to take off your shoes when you go to their house

Ah, but how are you pissing off the hygienists there, plus I’ve put on socks with holes and I have oualps on my toes, you put me to shame for eight lives with your desire for cleanliness of the floor.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

Put these freaks in the cell

10. People who talk too close to you when they’re drunk

And it stinks in their mouths and they sputter.

11. People who talk about a movie, show, or book saying “it’s very smart”

Technically that amounts to saying that you were smart enough to detect the level of intelligence of the thing and since you are necessarily stupid that does not mean anything. And if you weren’t stupid, you wouldn’t take yourself for someone intelligent so all in all you’re stupid in all scenarios.

12. People who play fictional music at their workplace

But why the hell are you banging all over your table? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS QUENTIN? (he is a colleague whom I secretly admire despite his hostile behavior on the gestural level).

13. People who won’t drop a fry when you ask them nicely (or not nicely for that matter)

It is simply insupportable. However, I will not deprive myself to steal one from them right away. Absolutely Yes.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

15 years in a remand center for being a fries scum

14. People who say “boutanche” or “valoche” or “baluche”, instead of saying bottle, suitcase, bag…

Do you take yourself for an Audiard film or koua?

15. People who say “awkwardness” or “awkwardness”

At the base we had the word malaise and we were really happy, what happened since then?

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

Go prison bro tchu force-fed me

16. People who use Bluetooth headphones thinking they’re cool

Whereas you drop them every other day in the gutter but put them back because they cost 200 bucks. Remember when we listened to music with wired headphones you soulless shit?

17. People who claim tunes on Lydia

Hey no but it’s okay you’re afraid that you will not be reimbursed old radasse? I’m the one who actually decides if I pay you. Moreover at the beginning of the application there was not this “receive” option where you claim like a little bastard for money. You’re pissing me off with your financial behavior.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

Limit you deserve that we redo capital punishment but hey, the dungeon will be enough

18. People who write in their texts “it’s fine” instead of “it’s fine”

Those who write “its going” are out of contest.

19. People you just met who ask your name again 10 seconds after hearing it

It’s not that it’s annoying but it’s annoying.

20. People who say “fireworks”, “pistoche”, “piche-nique” and “butt of bouq”

In a nutshell: old people.

21. People who put their feet in the opposite seat on the subway, on their desks or anywhere to look cool

While they reek of mutt shit from their disgusting feet these fdp I hate them.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

You make me phew I’m going to eat you

22. People who play music on their phone in public places

A great classic but it never became stylish.

23. People who walk in groups of 3 or 4 on the same line on the sidewalk and whom you can never pass

No, but you thought you were concrete and that you were going to be walked on to be able to overtake you?

24. People who have a particle name like “Du Moulin de Quinsonas-Oudinot dy Roy”

While in fact if it is they are nice (1 time out of 100).

25. People who wear their masks under their noses

But I think I’m even more pissed off by people pointing out that you’re wearing your mask under your nose. Hey guys did you think we were in a pandemic? Relax wsh.

26. People who say yes instead of yes

Like you are bilingual when you are barely monolingual. Limit you are just lingers.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

Drop the lawsuit, that person don’t even deserve it

27. People who refer to a third person and tell you “XXX, get out of this body”

But fuck yourself, I leave whoever I want in my body.

28. People you politely ask for information and cut you off by saying “HELLO FIRST”

But suck your ass with your filthy fennec shit politeness.

29. People who say they are on the left every two minutes

Already it’s annoying but when in addition they order their dinner on Deliveroo from their Alexa speaker, it deserves a slap.

30. People who get upset when you return a book they lent you and have dog-eared it on every page, taking pen notes in it with pizza stains on some pages.

Hey bro, it’s a book, you’re not going to read it again. Already it’s not very correct that you don’t give it to me, if in addition I can’t live my life as I want by reading it, we won’t get along.

top 30 times when we judge people and when we have the right (they just have to not do shit)

CHUI ON FIRE SO I JUDGE


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