So that we finally stop comparing him unnecessarily to Benzema – package for the 2022 World Cup – Giroud has just made us dream during the France-Australia match. The guy planted 2 goals which, added to those of Rabiot and Mbappé, allowed us to go from a rotten start to a magical moment. It may be time to put it down once and for all: there are plenty of good reasons to marry Olivier “Olive” Giroud.
1. He equaled Thierry Henry’s record
51 goals in the France team, damn it, it’s not nothing. And we say to ourselves that if he pushes a little more, the 52nd should not take long to arrive. Who hasn’t dreamed of making a wedding ring around a record holder’s ring finger?
2. He is the oldest French scorer in the World Cup
Already 36 years old (it’s because he’s no longer a young guy), Oliv’ set a new record yesterday by scoring as he became the oldest scorer for the French team in the World Cup. The weight of years has no impact on Giroud, which is good to know if you want to spend the rest of your life by his side.
3. He is approaching the end of his career
Which means that traveling right and left on weekends is almost over for Gigi. He will have time to devote to his family, barbecues with friends, and he can take the kids to school in the morning. Well, the little problem is that he already has a wife and four children. A detail, if you want my opinion…
4. He is the revenge of all the people who prefer Karting to F1
Karting fans are also much more numerous, and this is completely understandable. Who does F1 with friends at the weekend? Very few people, for the simple reason that no one can afford it. Karting is accessible, it’s family, and it’s fun.
5. He’s had enough hate as it is, now it’s time to give him some love
Unfairly mocked by Benzema fans for years when he was just doing his job, Giroud has still proven that he has his place in the world. Maybe it’s time to let her go once and for all and give her all our love, along with poems, flowers, and breakfasts in bed.
Ps: Benzema, we love you too, so get well and see you for Euro 2024.
6. He discovered when he was only 25 that he was nearsighted
Imagine his career if he had known before. The guy might be triple golden ball and have his statue on the forecourt of the Stade de France.
7. The English call it Giwuuu and it’s so stylish
When he was playing at Arsenal, Oliv’ had his own fan chant. Londoners were singing « lalalalalala » on the air of Hey Jude of the Beatles before concluding with “Geeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu” with their beautiful accent. Apart from Cantona, few French players can boast of having been so loved by the English.
8. He has a sick record
World Champion (yes, even if he didn’t score), Euro Finalist, French Champion, Italian Champion, Champions League, Europa League, FA Cup winner, League Cup (French and English), Top scorer in L1, L2 and Europa League… What is this crazy career? His next title is winner of my heart I tell you.
9. He has a haircut that makes all hairdressers shudder
It makes me want to take my 2 millimeter clog and reshape my neck.
10. He has extraordinary patience and never freaks out, perfect for the stability of your relationship.
Giroud can wait an hour near the surface without ever receiving a ball, go through a competition without scoring a goal, or even polish the bench for half a season, but he never gets angry. Zero melon, only humility and hard work. The perfect guy.
11. (Bonus) Because we already made a great song for him. We can spend it at the wedding.
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