Having ideas for renewal is good. When you’re a brand, it’s even essential. The only small technical element to respect for it to work is that this idea is not a big crap. Ah… Damn… Maybe we should have told you that before you tried to market the stuff below. The nerve, it is surely that, in fact.
1. BIC which launched into underwear
The pens are great. The lighters? Nothing to say. Razors, why not. But women’s disposable underwear… That’s slightly off topic, isn’t it? Already, for the first three, there are more eco-friendly reusable alternatives, but single-use underwear is really the last thing the planet and women need.
2. BIC again, and the pen “for women”
Once again: diversifying is good. But within reason, nonetheless. In 2012, the brand released a “for her” ballpoint pen. Translation: pens in “feminine” colors, and a thinner tube for “softer writing”… NICKEL. Not at all sexist and cliché this story.
3. Zara’s “Sheriff” outfits, in very bad taste
Big controversy at the release of this t-shirt… Surprising, isn’t it? Yellow star on striped top, doesn’t that remind you of a really ugly and dark part of our history? Fortunately, the product was quickly withdrawn from sales, but still… When do you market something like this, thinking that it’s okay?
4. The Rejuvenique Electric Mask
The idea: a mask that should reduce wrinkles by stimulating the muscles of the face, by sending small pulses. The problem: the design. Clearly. The thing is so creepy that it would have its place on the set of a horror movie. Nobody wants to wear that stuff. Nobody. Inevitably, it quickly fell into oblivion.
5. Crisps-laxative
Frito-Lay and Kellogg’s launched a fat-free version of crisps. On paper, it’s dreamy. On the toilets, it’s less pleasant. The substitute for this fat actually acts as a very powerful laxative. Suffice to say that the project did not last long.
6. Domino’s tattoos
But what a brilliant idea! In September 2018, in Russia, the pizza brand launched “Dominos Forever”, namely: 100 pizzas offered per year, for 100 years to all customers who tattooed the logo. It’s a bit stupid, but why not. Problem: hundreds and hundreds of people have agreed to live the rest of their lives with this logo anchored in their arm (proof that free food is worth all the splurge). Faced with too large numbers of people, Domino’s published restrictions on the size of the tattoo and capped the offer at 350 people. So happy when you get this shit tattooed… for nothing lol.
7. Colgate Frozen Meals
Not stupid to sell food to then be able to pass on toothpaste, right? In 1982, it is in any case the small idea of the brand, which launches into frozen ready meals. Well, it didn’t hit the mark and it even had a negative impact on the sale of toothpaste, but it was a good try.
8. Le boomerang Chanel
Usefulness ? 0. Price: 1900 dollars. I’ll let you draw your own conclusions. Like adults.
9. Heinz Colorful Ketchup
We all know that ketchup is bad enough (even if it’s delicious in a big dish of noodles). But then a purple ketchup… It’s bad AND unappealing. The initial objective of this failed marketing, developed in 2000: to attract children. Okay. The thing will still have held up for 6 years, before production was definitively stopped (thank god).
10. The Peek Tweeter
Brilliant idea of Twitter, which, in 2009, launched a kind of laptop that allows… From twitter. That’s all. Too useful at a time when there are things, called “smartphones“, which allow you to twitter but also to call, take photos, go to all social networks, send messages,… Unsurprisingly, it was a big failure.
We clash these big brands, but we are not much better. France still invented a good number of stupid things. Yes, the tektonik… That was us.
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