We are jerks. This is what foreigners who come to visit France think. And when we go around our habits, we can understand that some are a little disgusting… If you find yourself in at least two points of this top, it’s because you too are a big disgust (there’s no other words sorry).
1. We threw our trash out the windows
- 1 1. We threw our trash out the windows
- 2 2. We (always) throw our shit in the streets
- 3 3. We use fabric handkerchiefs
- 4 4. We don’t wash our hands well
- 5 5. We use little soap
- 6 6. We flee the shower
- 7 7. Some of us don’t change our underwear regularly.
- 8 8. We don’t have a bidet
- 9 9. We don’t brush our teeth well.
- 10 10. We wear our shoes inside
We’ve always been the crados of service. Already in the Middle Ages, we threw away our waste – including our personal productions – by the window. Already, it does not make you want to walk the streets. But the worst thing is that we discarded it without warning! You weren’t safe from walking quietly and receiving you… Finally you understood where I was coming from. Fortunately, in 1372, shouting “Watch out for water” 3 times before throwing everything away became compulsory!
2. We (always) throw our shit in the streets
We continue to take the street for a trash can. Cigarette butts, cans, paper or even masks: they are everywhere on our sidewalks, all the time, whether there are trash cans around or not. We imagine the heart attack of our Swiss neighbors when they cross the border. At home, it’s less fun: depending on the cantons, throwing waste in the public space is punishable by a fine of between 50 and 500 Swiss francs. So it’s clean. Very clean.
3. We use fabric handkerchiefs
You have to admit, this thing is really gross! You use it all day, put it back in your pocket, fiddle with it in all directions to find a small space still available before putting it back soaked in your bag. To all those who say it’s a fashion and luxury accessory, we’ll have to explain!
4. We don’t wash our hands well
“Wash your hands with soap”. Logic, you tell me. So how do you explain that the government has been repeating it to us over and over for two years? We see you, you who just pass your hands under water after staying 10 minutes in the toilet. You disgust.
5. We use little soap
A French spends 580g of soap per year on average: it is twice less than in Germany or Great Britain. We are criticized, but in reality, it’s just that we are more respectful of the planet. But that necessarily, it does not mark anyone!
6. We flee the shower
One in five French people do not wash daily according to a survey conducted by BVA in 2012. Do you see your colleagues around you? Well, if you took a shower this morning, it might not be the case for everyone…
7. Some of us don’t change our underwear regularly.
50% of French people and 25% of French women would not change them every day. NO THIS IS TOO MUCH. The bra, I want to understand. Who changes it every day? Anybody. BUT DAMN UNDERWEAR! There, you lost all my support.
8. We don’t have a bidet
Come on, we stay in the theme of intimate hygiene. The bidet is this small sink in the bathroom, which has almost become an unidentified object in France. And guess what ? It’s not just for rinsing your feet! At home, we started removing them in the 1970s, for economic reasons and to save space. Pragmatic. Our Italian neighbors have still not recovered. For them, Bidet is a religion.
You have a revenge to take with an Italian friend? Here is a song that could touch him deep in his soul: Oh how ugly, how ugly the bidet, oh how beautiful, how beautiful the sink! x2
9. We don’t brush our teeth well.
Do you see this teacher, this friend or even this work colleague who chews gum at 8am? Usually, he justifies it with “damn, I chew it all the time, otherwise it stresses me out.” No, guys, it’s not working anymore. We know very well why you chew an extra strong fresh mint Mentos early in the morning. Haven’t you noticed that since the mask is mandatory, you have more friends?
10. We wear our shoes inside
It may seem normal to you, but if you keep your pumps at home, WHAT ARE THE SLIPPERS FOR? In Germany, Switzerland, Scandinavia or Turkey, you take off your shoes before going home. Clean or full of mud. No matter. First, they consider it a mark of respect. But above all, it keeps the floor clean longer.
Note: you have the right to force everyone to wear them at home, if you have just bought the latest Dyson with blue light. There we understand. Truly. We are even jealous.