Top 10 Famous Writers Who Were Badass

Is literature sacred or not? We don’t really know, but what is certain is that among the famous writers, those who wrote things so well that we still talk about them today, there are some who were beautiful swellings. It’s the subject of the comic The Good Big Bastards of Literature by Aurélien Fernandez and Popesie, who show us that even among the geniuses of literature hide good big bastards, through anecdotes and criticisms made by other writers. We give you a link to the book at the end of the top, and in the meantime we will tell you about some of these buggers.

1. André Malraux was a looter of temples

The writer who was Minister of Culture was not always an exemplary figure. In 1923, he was totally broke due to bad investments in the stock market. So he thought it would be a good idea to go to Cambodia with his wife to steal statues from Khmer temples in order to resell them and make some money. They ended up being arrested and André went to prison. According to the memoirs of his wife Clara, he justified his thefts with a good puff phrase: “You don’t really think I’m going to work? » Holy Andrew.

2. Ernest Hemingway liked to kill animals.

Hemingway was a huge hunting fan. Not just hunting for food, huh, hunting to kill animals and make them trophies. He posed proudly with their corpses; the kind of photo that today systematically arouses indignation (and rightly so). He even listed the Big Five, these 5 animals of the savannah (Buffalo, lion, leopard, elephant and rhinoceros) that you had to kill if you wanted to be a “real hunter”. Or a real swelling, rather.

3. Guy de Maupassant willingly shared his STDs

The guy was known to spend his life in brothels and sleep with all the prostitutes around. Inevitably, one day, what had to happen happened: he caught the pox. One would have thought that would calm him down, but not at all. Instead, he bragged about it to a friend in a letter, explaining that now, at least, he was no longer afraid of getting the pox, since he already had it. And he explained to her that this lack of fear allowed him to sleep with even more prostitutes. In the text, it looks like this: “I fuck street whores, street whores and after having fucked them I tell them “I have pox”. And they are afraid and I laugh, which proves to me that I am far superior to them. » This guy is very sick.

4. Jean-Jacques Rousseau abandoned his 5 children

Rousseau wrote about education, among other things, encouraging people to have children and raise them. It’s very noble of him. What is less is that he himself abandoned his 5 kids to the hospice of foundlings, against the advice of their mother, even though relatives had offered to adopt them. In Confessions, he tried to justify himself by explaining that it was a way of providing them with public education, much like in The Republic of Plato, but they don’t do it to us: this guy is a big jerk.

5. Louise Colet did not hesitate to take out her knife

The 19th century poet did not appreciate an article by journalist Alphonse Karr. He revealed the adulterous relationship between Louise and Victor Cousin, a philosopher who has been somewhat forgotten today. Neither one nor two, she went to the journalist to stab him in the back. The journalist walked her home and apologized to her. So ok, his article wasn’t very cool, but still: planting people when you’re not happy is a bit extreme.

6. Gustave Flaubert violently clashed with all the writers of his time

If you have read Mrs. Bovary, you already know that good old Gustave might not be very tender with his characters, but he was the same with his counterparts. About Lamartine, he wrote: “He’s a eunuch, his balls fail him, he’s only ever pissed clear water. » And on Balzac: “What a man Balzac would have been if he had known how to write! » There are still plenty of others like that, but we let you discover them in the book. In any case, we can say that the guy knew how to make friends.

7. Edgar Allan Poe married his 13-year-old cousin.

He was 26. So yes, we can say that mores have changed, etc., but you should know that this marriage was already very badly perceived at the time, and that the (very) young bride had to lie about her age so that we can celebrate their union. It’s not very clear, all that, if you know what we mean.

top 10 famous writers who were badass
Photo credits (Public Domain): Unknown author; Restored by Yann Forget and Adam Cuerden

8. Arthur Rimbaud poisoned lots of dogs

Already we must remember something we only talked about briefly in high school: Rimbaud trafficked in arms, which was not very glorious. Besides that, he was also trading coffee in Ethiopia. This is a slightly less problematic area, except that to protect his stocks from dogs peeing on them, he was squirting poison all over the place, earning him a reputation as a dog killer. Surely there were other ways to protect his coffee without committing canine genocide.

9. Alfred Jarry had his own way of approaching women

An anecdote tells that the famous author of the absurd Jarry landed one day on the terrace next to a woman who attracted him. As she was not paying attention to him, he would have drawn his revolver to shoot in the mirror of the establishment, then would have exclaimed: “Now that we’ve broken the ice, we can talk. » It’s hard to say if all that is true, but what is certain is that today the guy who did this is going straight to gardav’ (and fortunately).

10. Voltaire was much more sexist than your drunk uncle

Some will claim that “Boh, it was like that at the time”, but suffice it to recall that he wrote: “Women are like weather vanes: they fix themselves when they rust. » to understand that he did not hold women in very high esteem. We still let you make your own opinion, but we have chosen. That doesn’t mean that we have to burn all of Voltaire tomorrow, but that we can have some perspective on the person. We could also have talked about his homophobia, his anti-Semitism and the fact that he traded with slavers, but after that it’s been a long time.

11. (Bonus) And lots of other good fat bastards in the comics that you can get right here


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