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They look attractive. They seem too good to be true. They are praised and loved, and they will do anything for you.
It’s not like a narcissist’s description, does it? But it can happen. Okay, at least initially when you first meet them, and that’s the problem. Many times, a narcissist will fool other people into thinking whether they are truly a great person or not, it is all just a task.
But they cannot hide their true selves forever. Eventually, their bad side will come to the fore, and it usually confuses other people.
What happened to that attractive person you met? Why did they change?
They did not change. They were just pressing who they really are.
What do you do if you find yourself in a relationship with a drug? How do you deal with a Narcissist? Or should you be upset at all? Should you just cut them out of your life and move on?
These are all important questions. But first, let’s talk about some communication strategies that you can use when you are talking to a narcissist.
How do you communicate with a Narcissist?
So, you think you are involved in a narcissist. They are not easy to deal with, so how do you actually deal with a Narcissist in terms of communication? There is not an exact science to this, but here are some suggestions.
1. Don’t Expect Them Much
Narcissists never give you much. They are very concerned with being “received” from other people, thinking about what they can do for you. The world revolves around them – no one else. Therefore, you cannot expect them to do much for you. I mean, you can, but you will be highly disappointed.
2. Do not engage in negativity
Negativity is a primary tool used by a parochialist. After the “honeymoon” phase described in the opening of this article, there is not much warmth and discussion or action. They have very little positivity. But don’t give in Refuse to play that game with them. Avoiding negativity is the first step in learning how to deal with a parochialist.
3. Use simple answers like “yes” or “no”
You can never win an argument with a Narcissist. Even if you are clearly right and they are clearly wrong, they will never “win” you. They can never accept being wrong. So, don’t try to explain them. Instead, just use simple answers, such as “yes” or “no.” In this way, they cannot move the conversation in their favor.
4. Ask clear questions
If you find a situation where you cannot avoid a conversation with a Narcissist, if they force you to constantly engage with them, just ask a lot of questions. Ask them why they think so? Ask them what they are feeling at any given moment. Most likely, they will not be able to answer you because they do not do any kind of self-examination. But at least you can try to point out flaws in their arguments.
5. Use Humor
Humor is a good way to spread almost any situation. When people are angry or arguing, they are just giving up negativity. When this happens, it becomes a downward spiral, which is difficult to recover from. So instead, try to inject some humor to try to spread negativity in your conversation. If you don’t know how to deal with a parochialist, you can always use humor.
6. Distinguish their behavior from their character
Many times, narcissists will engage in name-calling and character attacks against you. Instead of offending the narrator, you should separate their behavior (which they are doing or saying) from their character (who they are as a person). This strategy works well because it makes them less defensive. When you call them a terrible person (character), they will fire right at you. But commenting on their words and actions will help them see that what they are doing is wrong.
What does a Narcissist want in a relationship?
Why would a drug addict even want to be in a relationship? Relationships are about compromise and give-and-take, right? So, how do they possibly want to do this?
Well, here are some things that an addict can get out of being in a relationship.
1. A sense of entitlement
Because they feel that they are (or at least want to be) the center of the universe, they think they have everything they want. But life does not work that way. Therefore, narcissists are looking for someone who gives them their way all the time. Their sense of entitlement is a way of life for them, and so they look for someone who will ignore this character flaw.
2. flattery
Narcissists also have a large ego, even if this ego is false. In other words, they try to make other people think that they think they are better than them. However, many times the opposite is true. They don’t really think they are better than other people, so they need flattery to make themselves feel better. They need to be told how good they are.
3. Appreciation
By joining hands with flattery, drug users also crave praise. They want people to love them because they do not love themselves. Sure, it seems that they love themselves, but they do not. Therefore, they need to surround themselves with people who will “keep an eye on them” because they do not even see themselves.
4. Strength and Control
Narcissists like power and control. They like to think that they are superior to other people and, therefore, they need to have authority over them. They need to be controlled as much as possible in their world – and that includes controlling other people. So they like to be around the kind of people who can be easily controlled.
How do you stop a Narcissist from stopping you?
It is not easy to be in a relationship with a narrator, and they will inevitably try to hurt you by getting the upper hand. They don’t care about your feelings. They only care about themselves.
So, how do you deal with a parochialist? How can you possibly stop a drug addict from hurting you? Believe it or not, there are some ways.
1. Set boundaries
Narcissists will take advantage of you and walk on you – but only if you let them go. Remember, they want an easy hunt – someone who acts like a prey. So, don’t do that! Set firm boundaries and tell them that their behavior is unacceptable. Be consistent and stick to your guns.
2. Mindset / Attitude
Everything in life is about mindset and attitude. These are important if you want to learn how to deal with a narcissist. I like to say, “It’s only a problem if you think it’s a problem.” It is not that being in a relationship with a narcissist is not a problem – because it is. But keep your mind in a positive place. Do not give them the power to bring you down.
3. Do not take it personally
If you don’t remember anything else, remember this – their selfish behavior is about THEM, not you. It has nothing to do with you. They will act in the same way as anyone who allows them. Therefore, do not take it personally and think that there is something wrong with you because it is not.
4. Do not let them hurt you
Okay, so maybe they hurt you. Do not see them crying! They like weakness in other people – they thrive on it. When they see weakness in you, it will continue to encourage them what they are doing to you. Therefore, do not show them your feelings. Work courageously, even if you have to fake it because it will disable them. They want to break you down, so when you act strong, it “fun” for them.
5. Skip / Stop spending time with them
You do not always have the option to cut ties with a narcissist, but many times, you do. If you have tried your best to meet with them and you are still unhappy, get away from them. There is no reason that you have to allow them to get out of your life. Love enough to walk away from yourself.
final thoughts
Even though narcissists can make your life difficult, you should really feel sorry for them. Why? Because “people who hurt people are hurt.” If something untoward happened at some point in their lives, they would not be storytellers.
They probably became drug addicts just to survive. But as long as it is okay for them to feel sorry, it does not mean that you should put your needs above your own. love yourself first. Keep these tips in mind on how to deal with the drug. Do not abuse Stand up for yourself – because you deserve it!
More tips how to deal with a Narcissist
Featured photo credit: DANNY G via unsplash.com